I (sometimes) call myself Mr. Pondersome. I'm a rather wordy, weirdy person. I say hullo a lot. I write a lot more. While you're here, why not give some of it a read?

Friday, 25 July 2014

THE PORTUGUESE EXAMS - Part 1 (a.k.a. Another Serial Dug Up and Dusted Down)


Regan arrived at the exam room on time. The student and invigilator were already settled in.
            'So the teacher found you in the end,' the invigilator said.
            Regan pulled up a chair beside the student. 'I crossed him in the hallway.'
            'So he gave you all the particulars then?'
            Regan held up the sheets and the recording device. She had replaced the one she had received from the teacher with the one she had previously been asked to bring. The invigilator took it.
            'She's had five minutes to prepare already but I'll up it to ten so you can get sorted too.'
            'Actually I'm just about ready to start.' Regan smiled at the student.
            The invigilator scrutinised the buttons on the side of the recording device. 'It's just press record, isn't it? Nothing too complex?'
            'From what I can tell.'
            'All right then. If you're sure you're ready.' he pulled up a chair between Regan and the student. 'And...go.'
            'Hello,' Regan spoke in Portuguese.
            'Hello. How are you?' the student replied, also in Portuguese.
            'Fine. How old are you?'
            '16 years old.'
            'How's your mother?'
            'Still in jail.'
            Regan nodded slowly.
            'I like rock music,' the student said.
            'You're getting too serious. Ask me about my favourite band.'
            'Who's your favourite band?'
            'Toto. Try to be a bit more lively.'
            Regan smiled. 'So the classics then.'
            'This recording will fail, right?'
            'Yes. I rigged the device. He's not listening, is he?'
            'The invigilator? I doubt that.'
            'And he's the mark?'
            Regan leant back. 'So what's your favourite Toto song?'
            'Hold the Line.'
            'And how long have you been interested in this particular...classic?'
            'You mean the invigilator?'
            'Since he felt me up.'
            'He looked like he understood that.'
            Regan glanced at the invigilator. He was staring at her but quickly looked away.
            'How long before the device fails?' the student said.
            'Should short out at 2:40.'
            'Not long then.'
            'No. Are you sure about this?'           
            'My mother will pay you.'
            'She's in jail.'
            'She left me an allowance.'
            Regan sighed. 'I'll do it pro bono.'
            'No. She told me to give it to you.'
            The device started bleeping.
            'The money is in my jacket,' the student said.
            The invigilator held the device up to his ear. 'I think it's malfunctioning.'
            Regan took it from him. 'Yes. Fortunately I always carry a spare.'
            'I'm not sure its allowed.'
            'I've cleared it. If it makes you feel better I'll hand it in to the teacher myself, explain the situation.' Regan passed him the other recording device.
            'I'll still have to put this down in my report, you understand?' He barely looked worried. Yet another power trip.
            'That's fine,' Regan said. 'Now shall we start again? We've wasted enough of this young lady's time already.'
            'Fine.' the invigilator pushed a button and rested the recording device on the table.
            'Hello,' Regan spoke in Portuguese.

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